Wellness

3 Mindsets To Leave Behind in the New Year

Wow, I’m starting to think that New Year’s is one of my favorite holidays. I mean, there’s nothing like a fresh start! (The haters will say that you take everything that you didn’t deal with last year into the new year with you lol.) But there’s something about a new beginning. It’s empowering!

For me, the end of the year is always an amazing time filled with reflection and prayer. I think about:

  • How the year went
  • What went well and what didn’t
  • How I personally developed
  • What God taught me
  • Important lessons and takeaways
  • Whether or not I hit the goals I set out for myself
  • What I want to do differently the following year

During this time, I’m also able to hear God a lot more clearly. He reveals shortcomings and downloads vision for the upcoming year. And January is no different. It’s also a time of prayer and fasting, and my habits, rhythms, and routines are more in order. I work out more consistently. I spend time with God more consistently. I eat the right foods. I feel more focused, efficient, and productive.

So naturally, as I was reflecting on this last year, there were 3 things God highlighted that cannot come with with me into the new year. Of course, I say all of this knowing that I’m not perfect and there will be moments when I won’t always get it right, but for the most part, here are the three mindset shifts we should make this year!

1. From Worried to Trusting

Something I learned about myself this past year is that I spent entirely way too much time trying to plan every little detail. I’m a planner by nature and God wired me this way for a reason, so it’s a strength and a weakness all at the same time.

In its strength, I’m able to plan and execute amazing girlfriend coastal CA road trips like the one I did this past year. But in its weakness, I have a bad habit of spending too much time living in the future rather than the present. I have a tendency of trying to plan every single detail to the point of worrying things won’t go according to plan.

When you look at Scripture, God promises us an amazing future (Jeremiah 29:11), but He also shares with us the importance of living in the present. Matthew 6:34 tells us, “Do not worry about tomorrow because tomorrow has enough worries of its own.” Philippians 4  talks about being content whatever the circumstance.

When we plan or overthink whether it’s about finances, future goals, purpose, or anything else that requires our mental capacity, it ultimately means we’re trying to rely on ourselves rather than God. So instead of overthinking, over-planning, or worrying, I encourage you to lean into trust.

When the relationship isn’t working out, trust God.
When finances are overwhelming and you have no idea how you’re supposed to pay for certain bills, trust God.
When you’re worried about your future and how you’re going to do everything God has called you to do, trust God.

It’s a mindset shift where you literally have to stop yourself in the moment of overthinking and like Scripture says, take every single thought captive, submit it to Jesus Christ (2 Corinthians 10:5), and make a decision to trust.

This doesn’t mean you do nothing. You still take action — just without all the worrying. Because the whole point of trusting is accepting you won’t have all the details figured out, but you can rest and turn your brain off knowing that God holds you in the palm of His hands and He’s taking care of you and everything concerning you.

2. From Fearful to Focused

Another mindset I’m not taking into the new year is worrying about other people or worrying about what other people think about me. Can I get an amen?! I told a friend of mine that I’m taking “minding my own business” to whole new level this year.

The truth is when we give our energy, time, or attention to what other people think about us or on the other hand, worrying about other people and how they may or may not compare to us, we are wasting our time. It steals our contentment and our peace. And there are many reasons why we do this, but two common root issues are: fear of man and envy/jealousy.

If you find yourself:

  • Living in fear of what people think of you
  • Judging others because they don’t meet your standard of expectation
  • Envying people because you want what they have

It’s important to ask yourself not only why you are thinking like that but also the benefits (you probably wont’ find any) that come from it. I had to have a hard conversation with myself at the end of this year and I realized that I wasted A LOT of my time living in a place of frustration or fear when that energy could have been used towards something else like praying, working on my business, spending time with my husband, or making plans with friends.

The thing is time is a valuable resource. Without even realizing it, we can waste a lot of time doing things we don’t want to do. This requires a level of metacognition (thinking about what you’re thinking about) and making sure you’re intentional with your time and your thought life.

When we use our energy to focus on things that actually matter, we give room to live a more intentional and fulfilled life. That’s why the Bible says think on things that are lovely, noble, right, and true (Philippians 4:8), because when we do, then we experience the peace of God.

3. From Insecure to Confident

Lastly, and this one’s a big one for me. One thing I have struggled with for a while is insecurity — some of it due to what I just discussed with fear of man and some of it attributed to the way I was raised and how I was affirmed as a child. Being aware of this weaknesses, I finally got to a point where I’m just tired of being insecure. You know that old saying, you’re just tired of being tired? Yeah, that’s me!

I’m tired of not thinking I’m beautiful.
I’m tired of thinking I’m not good enough.
I’m tired of thinking I’m not doing or achieving enough.
I’m tired of comparing or measuring myself to other people.

(I know this is getting super deep and personal LOL). But if you find yourself in the same place of constantly battling insecure thoughts, then hopefully this will be an encouragement to you as well. I have personally made a decision where I am no longer going to allow myself to get to a place where I think low of myself.

In moments when I feel discouraged or insecure, I have made a personal commitment to choose confidence (and that’s confidence in Christ). I heard this quote that says, “The woman that you want to be, show up as her everyday,” and that’s exactly what I’m going to do.

And I want that confidence to showcase itself in every area of my life including my mental health, physical health, spiritual health, emotional health, social health, etc. I am choosing to believe in myself. I am choosing to believe what the Word of God says about me rather than what the lies in my head are telling me. I have become indignant about this.

There are so many people that live at a level lower than who God has called them to be and I refuse to be that person. I refuse to be someone that thinks little of themselves when God thinks so highly of me. If God can love me, why can’t I love myself the way that He loves me?

This doesn’t mean that I’m prideful or haughty. It just means that I have a level of confidence not just in me but more so the God in me that enables me to act and live in a way that represents that.

So if you’re like me, I encourage you to leave insecurity and fear behind. In moments when your thoughts are trying to convince you of untruths, I encourage you to choose what God says instead. I encourage you to become indignant and refuse to settle for anything less than what God says about you and that in regards to every aspect of your life.

Let’s Discuss

So these are 3 things that I’m leaving behind as I enter the new year and I am super excited to witness where I will be this time next year! Was there anything that stood out to you? I would love to hear what you’re leaving behind and what mindset shifts you’re planning to make this year.

Here’s to the new year and being everything that God has called us to be. Cheers!

Meet Hanha!

Hanha Parham is a Christian author and speaker. Her personal mission is to help woman overcome fear and self-doubt so that they can confidently believe who God has called them to be. She holds a Masters in Divinity with a concentration in pastoral counseling and is currently pursuing her PhD in Christian leadership. Hanha has published two books, Jesus is Bae and The Confessions Project and she is passionate about teaching, equipping, and discipling the body of Christ. When she is not encouraging others or writing her heart out, she loves spending time with loved ones or exploring new coffee shops. 

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